Remembering our beloved Heinz 57

We weren’t planning to get a puppy, but when my little brother saw a little black and gold ball of fur in a cardboard box outside Safeway, he begged my dad to buy it. My dad, always a softie, gave in rather quickly. We already had a dog—the opposite of this dog—a pedigreed miniature Schnauzer, but Dad knew that our existing dog was my dog. Our Schnauzer favored me over my brother. And besides, my brother had always wanted a big dog. Judging by the size of the mother, this puppy would get pretty large. He was a real Heinz 57. We were told he was a mix of black Lab, golden retriever, Rottweiler and maybe a few other breeds. Continue reading

Looking for love at 55, pt. 2

“Allison, I need to see you–somewhere discreet if possible.”

I read the text again to see if it made sense. Did Jim mean what I thought he meant? He had just returned home from a trip with the kids back East and had been sending me daily photos. I had begun to suspect he was interested in more than a friendship and this text confirmed it. Was I ready for the next step too? Continue reading

Crossing the threshold

Today was the day I took off my wedding rings. I hadn’t realized how much I played with them, rolled them around when I was bored, until now. I feel naked without them, exposed. I wonder if anyone will notice they are gone. Continue reading

How a liberal flip-flopped on MyPillow

It all started three Christmases ago, long before the Jan. 6 insurrection at the Capitol and long before the right-wing conspiracies that the election was stolen.

My husband bought us a set of MyPillows. He had heard an ad on his trusted apolitical news station while driving to work, and he became convinced that these were the best pillows in the world. Continue reading

What Grandma taught me about living a lockdown life

In mid-March, after California Governor Gavin Newsom ordered shelter in place, my mom and I commiserated over the phone. Continue reading

Covid chronicles: life with my 20-something son

I knew something was up when I saw the meat mallet out on the counter.

“Did you use the meat mallet for something?” I ask my son.

“Oh yeah,” he says, with a smile, running into the other room to get something.

He returns with a smashed brown pulpy mass, about the size of a small lime but looking more like a putrified fig.

“What is this?” he says. Continue reading

The April 15th that never happened

It’s April 15th. Normally this is a day for celebration in our household. Peter has finished the long race to the end of tax season. He and his staff go out for margaritas to celebrate. At home we finally have time to discuss fun things like upcoming vacation plans and the start of baseball season. Continue reading

Adventures in dog obedience training with Romeo and Sara: Part 2

Romeo’s fluffy white beard is matted with clumps of sticky peanut butter and his breath smells of Pupperoni dog treats. As soon as Sara leaves, he runs to his water bowl in the kitchen and drains it. Then he lays down in his spot in the living room for a nap. He’s just finished an hour-long session of dog obedience training. Continue reading

Zen and the art of making movies (with Miguel)

Earlier this month I flew to New York to watch my son Miguel film his final thesis project, a short movie he wrote, directed and starred in. It was fascinating observing a movie set up close and watching a group of about 20 people–cast and crew–throw themselves into the project for a marathon four days. I felt I had stepped into another world, the world of a New York film student, but also the world of a tender story about two brothers wrestling with their faith. Continue reading

Sorting out my messy thoughts on the decluttering craze

A few years ago Marie Kondo’s book “The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up” became a huge hit, inspiring readers around the world to simplify and declutter their homes. Her mantra is “spark joy”— she urges people to purge their possessions and keep only those things which give them joy. Continue reading